I was shopping at target with Bryna and my brother Erik. Bryna was looking at clothes. I told her I'd go grab the video games that were on our list. They pac-man set that came with other games and pac-man all by itself but both were damaged.
Erik had a dog and it was poopin' in the aisles of Target, which I found pretty amusing.
Then I was home, by myself, waiting for Erik and Bryna to get there. I lit a cigar and went outside to smoke it. I was sitting outfront trying to figure out how I was in front of our place but on the sidewalk, when we had two downstairs neighbors. Did their doors come out below the sidewalk? I decided I must have walked downstairs.
A woman, at least 7 feet tall ini a vegas showgirl sort of outfit with sparkles and lots of exposed skin came by and asked me if I lived there. She knew something about the person who lived there before. I walked her to where she was going, right next door and it dawned on me that she was probably a prostitute. She jumped and gave me a dirty look when I touched her belly. I asked if her if she'd come to my house right now and after assuring that I'd be okay with turning off all the lights she said okay. We were walking to my house when I gave in to the fact that she'd called my bluff.
"Um, you can't come over right now, my brother and my girlfriend are coming back." she gave me another dirty look. "Can you come back at 10? We'll have a threesome." She agreed, for $100. I now had less than an hour to convince my girlfriend to have a threesome with a 7 foot tall stanger, with the lights off, and hopefully she wouldn't be aware that I was paying this stranger $100.
I woke up.
I don't smoke cigars in real life. And in real life I know that 7 foot tall prostitutes who want the lights off have wieners.