RockAss.net; Dreams

Just your basic dream journal. I will attempt to record all of my dreams here, no matter how mundane or humiliating they may be.
Keep in mind, I wake up and crawl to the computer and write these before coffee, tea or anything so yeah, they're a mess. Enjoy.

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Location: Sacramento, California, United States

Sea Monkey devotee since childhood.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Suits

I'm at my friend's house, there's a party I think, and then it's just me and Mike and Charles about to watch a movie. The house is big but totally bachelor, messy, cluttered, etc. These ladie's show up and they're there to serve, um, someone, either Mike or Charles, like he was a god. They're going to cook and clean and they give us all suits and as I'm trying on my suit someone jokes that "They have a good cook but too bad they don't have a tailor" because only my suit really fits right.
I leave to head home and it occurs to me that these women will allow us all the luxeries of the rick life but we'll pay for every priviledge with a huge increase in our chances of getting hurt. As I run toward home past huge chunks of broken glass I see my shadow and I think "That would look so cool in a movie." My coat is flying behind me, and over me as I run and it has straps which are whipping about like medusa snakes. Very comic book. I get home. Where I live is like a brownstone in N.Y.
I wake up.

Monday, June 19, 2006

Weirdness

I don't know where to begin so I'll jump right in.
I was a at some big party and it was sexual in nature but know one was having sex. Some woman was telling erotica stories.

The U.N. Put me in charge of some high profile woman's magazine or woman's event or both.
At the U.N. the Chinese were discussing how to show respect for and get along with the Shi'ites.
Some strange graphic was woven in with sexualized nuclear missiles including one in bed with a woman, the tip in her mouth ala oral sex. The black and white graphic was a two stage animation, the missile moving slightly in and out of her mouth. There was a soundtrack saying something about violence.

I woke up (in the dream, not in real life) and my friends from the party and I all stood on the driveway of some house talking. A girl I didn't like started kissing my buddy who was part Lewis from The Drew Cary show and part my friend Homes who I used to work with at Spike and Mike. I started bitching, "Ah man, why's he gotta be kissing HER!" She got mad, he got mad. I walked to the end of the drive way with him and told him I was kidding. He was holding a white bucket and I was kicking with both feet into the bucket, like I was lifting myself up with something but there was nothing to lift myself up with.

Friday, June 16, 2006

Work, pool

I was at work. The office was real open ,with sliding glass doors and lots of windows. There was a back yard with a big empty above ground swimming pool.

I asked Allen why it wasn't full and he said there was a problem with the filter. I walked to the middle of the pool and looked at the filter. All the mexican workers started whistling and clapping. They figured I was fixing it and now I felt obligated to do so. I cleaned out the filter's big donut shaped strainer and put it back together. I started filling the pool.

It seemed like it would be all the way full and then empty again. I notice that on one side it had no wall to hold the water in, and it seemed it would fill the neighbors yard with water, but I knew it had been full so I just had faith and kept filling. I walked around in very shallow water and picked up big dog turds. We coudnt have dog turds floating around in our swimming pool.

I woke up.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

A Party

Planned a birthday party for myself. It was to be at my friend Jason's house. I ran around making arangements and by the time I got there lots of people were there and had been there for some time. They were mostly older folks, and mostly Jason's friends and family, though my mom and my aunt were there and maybe one of my brothers.

I assumed it was a night time party but everyone else seemed to regard it as a day time party. I had a tape that my uncle made me of classic rock.

I went upstairs to Jason's room to get ready and I took a nap for ahwile. I knew that my aunt was pissed that they'd come to my party and hardly saw me at all.

By the time I came back downstairs everyone was gone. I figured it was just the old folks, that my friends would be showing up for a night of partying but then it became clear that it was over. Nobody else was showing up.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Working, sorta

I'm working at grocery store and my brother Edward is showing me to use a piece of cardboard as a makeshift shelf while loading bags.
Then the dream is that I'm participating in a simulation, pretending to work in a grocery store, and pretending to have a wife and kid. The wife pretends to die in an auto accident and then she comforts our kid. I'm trying to cut in and be the comforter because it doesn't make sense for her to comfort him as he copes with her death?

Monday, June 12, 2006

Two Boring Dreams

It's early morning, still dark out and I'm driving Allen's bus down a dirt road with houses on either side. Allen's trying to help me find the drive way. It's a sharp turn and I have to back up a little to correct. I back up, but I can't find the break pettle. The road is set high, like a levee and I roll off of it. I try to gun it back up onto the road but the bus won't budge. Allen says it won't make it and he gets out of the bus to find a way to toe or push the bus with another vehicle. While he's gone I roll back the rest of the way off the road, into someone's front yard. I drive across their yard and use their driveway to get back on the road. I pull the buss into Allen's yard.
The dream shifts. Paul come's out. It's now his house and his yard. I talk to paul who is wearing a tie loose around his neck, not with a dress shirt. I am driving back down the road, the sun is out and I see what a mess all the houses on Paul's street are. I wonder if everyone's working on their houses as much as Paul is on his.

I wake up.

The night before I dreamt about my pills that I take for the Ulcerative Colitis. My pills have a special coating that doesn't disolve until they reach my colon. In the dream the pills were round like cheerios and the coating went across the middle of the o, the whole.
The coating was cracked and chipped in spots. That's it. Boring dream.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Burning Man again

Another in a long line of Burning Man Dreams. Weather heats up, I dream about the trauma in the desert.

So it's crowded, more like a flea market than burning man, but I know I"m at burning man. I stop to get some food in this make shift indian restaurant in a big tent. There's a line. The indian kid serving our food is pretty hippy dippy looking and he's telling someone about his crazy Uncle and you can tell that he just totally looks up to this uncle and loves him and what not.

Then, there's his uncle and he's all painted blue with red lips and he has big old crazy hair and a big old crazy beard. Pretty cool. There are two girls behind me in line and they seem to think this is cool not because it's cool but because he's Indian. Like it's a disabillity and he achieved wild freaky coolness in spite of it. I don't know how I know this, it's in their amazed smiles, vacant stairs, and maybe I can read their thoughts, I mean it's a freakin' dream. But I see the guy as just cool and excited about life and that shows how enlightened and great I am. Yeah.

I hook up with my brothers and they go skating. I go to find them and they're skating on this sidewalk in front of a building that's like 70's school building, at Burning Man?! Inside the building are a bunch of folks who watch us skate, which sucks because we're not that good and it's annoying to be watched so closely.

I think I woke up here. I wanted to write the dream down right away with all the crazy stuff but I was too tired to get up so I probably lost some stuff. When I finally did get up I had to go be a mime.

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Bug Bombs

I had a dream a few weeks ago that I missed writing about.

Everything was picure postcard colored, like I was living in a childrens bible illustration. Blue, blue skies and green, green grass. I stepped outside my perfect house in a perfect, clean, new suburb and saw the war planes going over head. I was scared at first and then I realized they were just here to drop the insecticide. (Note: Sacramento had a mosquito eradication program last year that was pretty upsetting.)

The bug bombs were dropped a few miles from me. I could see the bombs drop, hit the ground and then break into smaller bombs which bounced up and spread out. When these smaller pieces hit they two broke apart sending smaller bombs out in every direction. Bombs flew past me, a few very small pieces even hit me. I could see smoke and fire from where the first, larger bombs fell and as I ran toward the destruction a man who was torn up by shrapnel was carried past me.

Christine

I dreamt I was in a church or a classroom, I think it shifted in the dream between being a church and a classroom. Whichever it was, we were in an old ghost town. My ex girlfriend Christine was there. I was heavily attracted to her. When everyone had to hold hands I was thrilled that I was holding hands with her.

At some point the teacher/preacher put on a film of the now dead preacher that used to give sermons in this church (it was definitely a church at some point, even if it was being used as a classroom now). I sat next to Christine and made funny cracks as the creepy film played.

Note: I dated Christine before Bryna. It's been over 14 years since we broke up. I'm sure I'm dreaming about her because I've been thinking about writing the story of my relationship with her. It was a wild three years of on again off again.

Monday, June 05, 2006

Giant Tiger

I'm watching a show at a strange run down outdoor venue. An old guy's playing guitar and the owner of the place shows off his animals as part of the show. I notice the giant tiger behind the old guy. it's literally a giant, like king kong size. The tiger is at first balanced unnaturally on it's head, but the dream shift and the tiger start to look more realistic but it stays giant and it has big sabre teeth. I look at the fence holding it in, and I realize that we're all screwed if this tiger decides to eat us, and I'm sure he will. There is no way this fence will even inconvenience this giant tiger when he wants to leave the enclosure.

I start making my way through the crowd. The first part of the plan, get to the back of the crowd. He'll eat them first, which will give me some time at least. Now it seems I'm the one fenced in. A large fence with barbed wire is in my way. Oh well, I can get over barbed wired, I've done it before. The dream ends there.

I wake up and check the time. It's 5:30 am. I go back to slepp. I dream that I'm telling my mom about the giant tiger dream and she's giving me advice about how to get away from the giant tiger. My brother Erick is there as well. My mom drives me somewhere and there are people just standing on the road. They wave us to go around them! I start to say the F word in front of my mom, enough that she knows what I'm saying. I never curse in front of my mom.

Then I'm at my friend Becca's. Once inside her house I try to give her a friendly hug and she stops me. I feel insulted. I get on my shoes as our friend Amber arrives, talking a mile a minute. I split, sayinig a quick goodbye on my way out the door.

Saturday, June 03, 2006

I'm a slimeball in my dreams

I was shopping at target with Bryna and my brother Erik. Bryna was looking at clothes. I told her I'd go grab the video games that were on our list. They pac-man set that came with other games and pac-man all by itself but both were damaged.

Erik had a dog and it was poopin' in the aisles of Target, which I found pretty amusing.
Then I was home, by myself, waiting for Erik and Bryna to get there. I lit a cigar and went outside to smoke it. I was sitting outfront trying to figure out how I was in front of our place but on the sidewalk, when we had two downstairs neighbors. Did their doors come out below the sidewalk? I decided I must have walked downstairs.

A woman, at least 7 feet tall ini a vegas showgirl sort of outfit with sparkles and lots of exposed skin came by and asked me if I lived there. She knew something about the person who lived there before. I walked her to where she was going, right next door and it dawned on me that she was probably a prostitute. She jumped and gave me a dirty look when I touched her belly. I asked if her if she'd come to my house right now and after assuring that I'd be okay with turning off all the lights she said okay. We were walking to my house when I gave in to the fact that she'd called my bluff.

"Um, you can't come over right now, my brother and my girlfriend are coming back." she gave me another dirty look. "Can you come back at 10? We'll have a threesome." She agreed, for $100. I now had less than an hour to convince my girlfriend to have a threesome with a 7 foot tall stanger, with the lights off, and hopefully she wouldn't be aware that I was paying this stranger $100.

I woke up.

I don't smoke cigars in real life. And in real life I know that 7 foot tall prostitutes who want the lights off have wieners.