Three New Dreams

Some manner of duck or puppy or duck/puppy hybrid is coming onto an elephant, all rubbin' up on 'im and what not. Love me eleaphant. The elepant doesn't seem to notice.


My Dad tells me, "This dog really hates this tooth." He takes the tooth, which he only recently had extracted from his head, and he throws it on the ground. The Dog (who is my childhood pomeranien, Wicket) freaks, barks and growls at the tooth and then picks it up and puts it as far under our shelves as it will go. The dog leaves the room, and dad pulls the tooth out and puts it back in the middle of the floor. When the dog wanders back into the room, he's happy and mellow, until he sees that tooth. Then the whole freak out and try to hide it under the shelves thing all over again.


I'm at work only work is in a house that's a-lot like my childhood home. Allen and I share an office in real life and in the dream our house is in what was the front bedroom, it's dark and it's a total mess. I'm in there and Vivian (the office manager, a feisty older Mexican woman whose has had several brushes with death but just refuses to die. You should also know that she preaches at me, A-Lot.) comes in and accuses me of doing drugs. I tell her I don't do drugs. I'm tired to the point of feeling drugged. She attacks me and scratches my face. After she scratches my face she goes back up front. I tell Dave (the boss) what happened and he isn't going to do anything about it. I go home. I don't work there anymore. I decide to sue, and I start getting excited figuring I'll never have to work again. I am hoping that the scratches on my face are deep enough when the police come. I will of course have to file a police report. I wake up dissappointed and relieved. It takes me a while to remember that Vivian is actually very sweet to me. There is some HEAVY underlying tension in the office though, and I'm sure that's where this one comes from.

From childhood

1) when I was a kid I dreamt that I took a hole punch and punched a hole in my scrotum, to see what was inside. I was bleeding of course, and realized that this was going to need some seriou attention. I was horrified that I would have to show my mom and dad the hole I punched in my scrotum.


2) The farmer down the street had a pussy tree. The tree had pussy's all over it. I wanted so badly to stick my dick in one off 'em, but the farmer would shoot you with salt pellets which hurt like hell, or so I was told. Of course, I couldn't resist forever. I snuck over his fence, climbed the tree and found a good sticky wet pussy. It was coated with something like honey. I started fucking that tree and even as I saw the farmer come out of his house, I had to finish. He was shooting, I was fucking, finally I ran off. God damn, I wished I had that pussy tree.

one i missed

Couple of days ago, dreamt the world was ending. It was a pain in the ass. So many people to be processed, including me, and I'm there, wanting to do it right, wanting to seize my chance to get a few things in the next world that I was maybe missing in this one, but it was enough just to try and keep up with the lines and the crowds.

Everything was white with chrome accents, our clothes were white, the only color was the different shades of flesh from the crowds of people we filed past cashiers and turnstiles and rode on escalators.

Yeah. A pain in the ass.



NOTE: proabably triggered by my re-reading of The Chronicles of Narnia including the last book where the end of the world is one big boring affair.

real doll, dinners ruined, skateboarding

I have a real doll. I'm having a threesome with my girl and the doll but just messing around really. She has to go do something, so I have anal sex with teh doll. There is some kind of epair guy in my room I don't know if he saw me doing it with the real doll (how could he not have) but he definitely sees the doll now and comments on it. I put the doll away, folding it up and putting it out of site (under the bed maybe?)

Olivia, from Oli-Pom's store closed down and she's working at some trendy mall place with skateboard decks attached to their rack even though they have nothing to do with skating. here and I make fun of this. I feel bad that she's working somewhere so lame.

My family has a get together, the WHOLE family, nephews and nieces included. Complicated, Erick making dinner, but dinner burnt or something and we have to make different dinner and dad shows up and is pissed at what happened to original dinner and John is taking it all personally as if he is being blamed.

I get WASTED stoned with James and then hop in the car with my mom. We're in a back yard that's huge, just acreage, so she's driving across the yard when I hop in her car. We go somewhere in the city.

I'm skateboarding, it's a bright fairly warm fall day. I ollie and break my deck. I'm part proud, like it's a big deal to break my deck and part pissed. I thow half the board, but I"ll pick it up, because I'll just be putting the trucks on a new deck.

Breaking my deck.

Big beautiful house, lots of snow, amazingly scenic. Morning, standing outside looking at the show hanging on all the foliage. My family’s on the way to pick me and my brother Erick up, everyone’s hurrying. I am entertaining the thought of living in this house for awhile.

I look outside, to enjoy the view again. It’s pouring rain.

I’m at John’s. There’s a little black girl there. A friend of his daughters. She’s overly well dressed and made up, not garish just strange, like she stepped right out of a JC Pennys catalogue.

I’m back in my little apartment, it’s pouring rain still. There’s a little girl there playing video games with me. I don’t know if she’s a niece or what but I’m apparently babysitting her. We both hear a banging noise. (I did get out of bed last night for real after hearing a banging noise. Never found out where it came from) Checked the front door, checked the back door. Two guys are outback. I kinda know ‘em but I don’t really want to let them in. I don’t trust them for some reason. But they’re supposed to help me with something on the computer. I don’t know what. They seem to sense my discomfort and move away. They’re standing in the rain. (Very simmilar to dream from two nights ago where two guys in the rain knock on the door at my work.)

I think I invite them in but I wake up right around here.

No Pants and fighting in the rain.

I'm at work, and it's busy but close to closing time. It's already dark out. I take off my pants and wander around in my boxers as comfortably as I might if I were at home. Two guys are acting kinda weird in the yard, then they knock on the door of the office and want to come in. The door, the whole wall actually, is glass like a storefront. I find a pair of pants. I have pants laying all over the plae. They're out there in the rain and I tell them they can't come in we're closing.

I go to the front door and the guys it turns out are there to pick up one of our employees. They're mad that I wouldn't let them in and they want to fight. I tell them that this ridiculous. They're friends my co-worker, there's no reason we should fight, it's just a misunderstanding. I realize I'll have to fight them. I square off against one guy and a girl put up her fists as well. They were gonna fight me two at a time.

I run back in the office to see who will fight with me. Ben is there. His face looks crazy, surprised, pissed, ready to kick ass. We run back out and I grab a guy by his head, and push down with all my weight smacking his head into the ground again and again. I realize this could kill him, so I rewind, and just bang his head on the ground once. I punch him hard in the face, but I realize this is too much too and I rewind again. I wake up. I never want to be in a fight again. Hurting people sucks.

snippets

Two short dream snippets:

1) Tony Hawk is paralyzed from the neck down, but he seems as happy and together as ever and is still real involved in the skate scene, opening skate parks and what not. I'm looking at him thinking, damn, he lost the thing that his whole life has centered around.

2) I'm at Burning Man which is like a water park but the tickets are still over $200. I buy my ticket and then a big wave knocks me on my ass. I look and the wave came from a little pool, barely bigger than a jacuzzi after my dad cannon balled into it. Dad is laughing affectionately while sitting in the pool.

Baseball impotent tomato head

This is all from one dream that just wandered all over the place:

I host the first night of some two night show at The Crest. My mom apparently watched a video of the first night and is at night two saying it’s hard to see her baby saying the kinds of things I say while hosting. I think I hosted mostly as Francois Fly. I tell her I’m making a small appearance in the show tonight doing some cleaner material. The clean material is a few jokes I just thought of and asked if I could perform.

Baseball, I’m little skinny guy, pitcher trying to hit me with ball, I’m trying to bunt, I get a lite hit toward third base, by luck it’s over thrown by third baseman and I end up getting a home run and bringing two other players home. We’re all uniformed like a pro team.

James (my little brother) is telling me he hasn’t wanked in a few months he’s shy about telling me, using hand gestures. I get the feeling he’s saying he’s been impotent. I suggest he try some new porn and try wankin’ even if he’s not hard.

Allen and James are watching Barney Miller, Barney is slightly Groucho-fied.

Talking to Michelle asking advice about James’ problem. Michelle shows me a project she did for a group art show. I try to get photos of the slides she’s done as they’re projected on the wall, trying mostly to get a good pick of michelle’s face, but the person working the projector goes WAY forward or WAY backwards when I try to get them to inch either direction. Finally some crazy animation comes on of some tomato head rapping. It’s awesome, the music is Tom Waitsish and the animation rules. We all fawn over Michelle who is shy about it.