; Dreams

Just your basic dream journal. I will attempt to record all of my dreams here, no matter how mundane or humiliating they may be.
Keep in mind, I wake up and crawl to the computer and write these before coffee, tea or anything so yeah, they're a mess. Enjoy.

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Location: Sacramento, California, United States

Sea Monkey devotee since childhood.

Monday, October 12, 2015

I'm in a small rural town in the middle of festivities. They have a miniature or baby cow and they're trying to milk it but the cow is scared and trying to get away, and I'm getting upset because it keeps getting worse for the cow. Then a big man takes a weight with a handle attached, and hits the cow on the head hard enough to kill it. I take a black jack and go hit the guy, maybe mutliple times, I think my brain hit rewind and then redid this scene a few different ways which is a thing my brain does  sometimes in dreams. I was arrested and and taken to jail. When I get out, I'm at a small house on the main street and the guy is there but now he seems younger and he's very handsome and he explains his side. And I say, "You've been kind to me. Thanks." and I leave.

Thursday, October 08, 2015

Matt McCord was getting me ready to play on stage with him. We had a big audience and the music kicked in, and Matt, who is a bass player in the this dream, is telling, "Just hit G, then C" or something like that and I had no idea how to follow these instructions and the crowd is starting to notice that I am not playing actual music on the guitar.

Staying at a hotel, couldn't go in the pool unless I was manscaped by a person on staff. Went to my room and awaited the manscaper. Several people were going to stick around for the manscaping, including one woman who said she was curious about it. I said sure. I lay down and a person came in with a big rusted metal sheering device. Also gave my face a shave with a razor and some kind of shaving solution. I noticed my face wasn't very close or clean shaven.

Sending my daughter into another room to hang out with my mom so I can fondle and talk dirty to me wife. I realize my phone had butt dialed my mom and I'm worried that she heard the filthy things I was saying.

Thursday, October 01, 2015

Comedian dreams

Dreamed I got an awesome blue suit to film my next special in and then got my nails painted a matching blue, and it looked really cool.

Also dreamed I went to visit Dan Murphy in Denver. Don doesn't live in Denver, but he did in my dream and right when I got there I remembered that I had a weekend of shows in Sacramento and that I needed to come home right away. Dan was trying to get his baby to go to sleep.

 And the night before last I dreamed that Hasan Minhaj invited me to work on a project with him but he didn't look like Hasan. He had his hair combed straight down over his forehead and thick glasses. I asked him about this and he said, "Yeah, it's my new look."